Wei Wuxian may not have the best memory, but he nods all the same. He remembers, more so, he knows from past experience just what a battle can cost. It's naive to think there wouldn't be casualties, and really it is lucky that these deaths, however it may work, aren't permanent. But it doesn't make the pain of the loss any less.
"Why, because I'm so polite too?" he does smile at that, even if it's all in hypotheticals.
"If you're not an asshole at least some of the time, you're probably up to something," he trails off for a moment, taking a quiet breath, "how do you... handle it? Feeling like this, after he's gone?"
You don't. Shepard considers leaving it at that. But something brings her up short with an unexpected sense of shame. When Thane had died, no one had mentioned it, not for months, and it had been Kolyat of all people who took the necessary steps, while she'd been... doing what, exactly?
"I, uh... I don't know. Mostly I just drink too much. I skip sleep, maybe I get a little more stupid in battle than I should. I'm known for a risk-taker, so I don't think anyone really notices," Which was an ugly sort of thing to think, about your best friends in all the world. Shepard looks down at her glass— empty— and sighs, "I never expected to live this long. I was actually kind of hoping this last big push would finally be the one that killed me. It's a war. People die in wars all the time. Oh yeah..."
She turns away from what Garrus would call contemplation and Joker would definitely call teenage brooding, and offers Wei Wuxian a sharp, toothy sort of grin.
"And I hunted down the son of a bitch who killed him, and cut out the bastard's heart."
All of those sounded way too familiar. Wei Wuxian had always been fond of liquor, but after Lotus Pier, it was harder and harder to be sober. He hadn't slept much then, and he'd definitely done some stupid things in battle.
"I think I can check all of those off the list, except the last one," his smile feels a little sharp as he finishes off his drink and waves for another round.
"That's the spirit," Shepard tells him, unhelpfully. She probably ought to be encouraging him to breathe and let it go, or to think about how he isn't dead, not really, and will be back again in no time. But she's never had a particularly healthy personality, except in that almost nothing can truly break her, "And you know I'm always up for hitting things."
If he had a person to direct the anger toward, one he could actually go after, he'd already have done so, but in the mean time, it just makes him all the more determined to drag out the ones in hiding and make them pay in blood and bone.
"The hunting down is the hard part," his expression is still cool for a moment longer before his eyes slide to the empty glass and he nods.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
"Why, because I'm so polite too?" he does smile at that, even if it's all in hypotheticals.
"If you're not an asshole at least some of the time, you're probably up to something," he trails off for a moment, taking a quiet breath, "how do you... handle it? Feeling like this, after he's gone?"
no subject
"I, uh... I don't know. Mostly I just drink too much. I skip sleep, maybe I get a little more stupid in battle than I should. I'm known for a risk-taker, so I don't think anyone really notices," Which was an ugly sort of thing to think, about your best friends in all the world. Shepard looks down at her glass— empty— and sighs, "I never expected to live this long. I was actually kind of hoping this last big push would finally be the one that killed me. It's a war. People die in wars all the time. Oh yeah..."
She turns away from what Garrus would call contemplation and Joker would definitely call teenage brooding, and offers Wei Wuxian a sharp, toothy sort of grin.
"And I hunted down the son of a bitch who killed him, and cut out the bastard's heart."
That day, had been a very satisfying day.
no subject
"I think I can check all of those off the list, except the last one," his smile feels a little sharp as he finishes off his drink and waves for another round.
"But it's just a matter of time."
no subject
She's got your back, you vengeful bastard.
"You want another?"
no subject
"The hunting down is the hard part," his expression is still cool for a moment longer before his eyes slide to the empty glass and he nods.
"Only getting started."